I Can't Want You
by Nini-7
Summary: Faye thinks that all this jealousy she is feeling when she sees Jake and Cassie together is because she still has feelings for Jake, but it might not be the reason. Set after Beneath. Main Pairing: Chamberlake.
1. Prologue

**Disclaimer: **I do not own anything of the secret circle.

**Author's note:** This is going to be a Chamberlake story, set after Beneath. I know that there is a possibility of them being half-sisters, but I refuse to believe it until I know for sure, and they will not be related in this story. Anyway, this is just a short kind of prologue chapter.

Faye was lying in her bed, thinking about everything that had happened the night before.

_-Flashback-_

_Faye watched as Cassie stood up and walked over to the couch on which Jake was sitting. Jealousy boiling up inside of her as the blonde leaned forward, pressing their lips together. Faye knew that she had been a bitch to most of the people in this room, but that didn't mean that she didn't have feelings, and it felt like Cassie and Diana didn't care about them at all. Jealousy soon turning to anger as Faye jumped up, yelling at Cassie for stealing her guy, before escaping out of the house._

_Later that evening, however, after the whole ghost of herself thing, when they found her grandfather in the water, it was in Cassie's arms that she found herself. She hadn't planned to walk into her arms, but when she turned away from her grandfather, it just kind of happened. _

The short blond girls body pressed against hers, their arms wrapped around each other, had made her feel a little better.

Faye let out a sigh, sitting up in her bed, angry at herself for what she was feeling, "Faye, you hate this short blond girl who's trying to steal your man." She said to herself. She had just needed someone to comfort her, and Cassie had been the closest when she had turned around. That's all there was to it, she told herself before getting out of bed and ready for school.

As she pushed the thought of Cassie's arms out of her head, the thought of why she had been in them to begin with came rushing back to the front of her thoughts. She felt her eyes begin to sting again, as she realized she would never get to see her grandfather again.

She looked at herself in the mirror and stood up taller, "You will not become weak because of this," she told her reflection.

**Author's note: **So how did you like this short little introduction chapter, would you guys like me to continue this story?


	2. I just want to forget

**Author's note: **_Thanks guys for all the reviews :) I'm glad you enjoyed the prologue. I know that this chapter is short again, but I'm just not good at writing long chapters. I don't know why, so hopefully you like this next chapter, even with the shortness of it._

**Chapter 1 – I just want to forget**

Faye looked at herself in the rear view mirror, trying to compose herself as she wiped away the few tears that had run down her face on the way to school. She had pushed any thoughts of last night out of her head, but emotions of it were still there. She fixed her make-up, took a deep breath, and made her way out of the car and towards the school.

She'd been able to avoid the others in the circle until lunch, skipping science class that most of them had with her. She knew that if she talked to them, they would just keep asking her if she was okay, and she didn't think she could stay strong through all of that. Never again would she let them see her as weak as that.

When Adam, Dianna and Melissa saw her walking into the cafeteria, they all stopped talking to look at her, giving her worried looks. She knew she had to deal with this sometime, she couldn't keep running away from them forever. Sucking in a breath, and standing tall, she walked over to their table, giving them a fake smug smile.

"I know I'm hot, but for all of you to stop talking and stare at me while I walk in, I'm kin-"

Her voice faltered when she saw Cassie, walk into the cafeteria through the opposite door, "Well, this has been…great. I've got to go…see my mom now. Bye." She said in her fake, sweet voice. She turned around and walked back out the door she had just came in, taking deep breaths as she got out the door.

Seeing Cassie had made all the thoughts and emotions from last night come rushing back to her, it had felt like someone had hit her in the middle of the chest. The feelings of despair and sadness of her grandfather's death, the jealousy and anger of seeing her with Jake, and some other feeling that she couldn't quite describe, or that she just didn't want to.

Not in the mood to go to her afternoon classes, Faye made her way out of the school and to their abandoned house in the woods. All she wanted right now was to find a way to go on with her life as if yesterday had never happened.

She found Diana's book of shadows in the same place she always hid it, she was looking for something, maybe a spell that could help relieve her of all these things she was feeling, that she wished would just disappear.

Time passed without her realizing it, and too soon she heard the sound of a door opening. Pretending not to care, she kept on staring at the pages of the book in her hands, unable to actually read them.

"Faye…"


	3. What are these feelings?

**Author's note: **_Thanks to all of you who read and story alerted my fanfic. And a special thank you to those of you who gave me such nice reviews, it really means a lot. And I'm sorry homobo362, I really tried to make this chapter longer but I didn't want you guys to have to wait too long for the next one, so hopefully you guys like it anyway. _

**Chapter 2 – What Are These Feelings?**

Faye heard her name, not louder than a whisper, but it had her heart beating faster when she looked up to meet the blue eyes of the short blond girl, standing at the entrance of the room.

"What do you want, Cassie? I'm kind of busy." She said, and then tried to return her attention to Diana's book to prove her point, but all she could do was stare blankly at the page, her attention still on Cassie. The more she tried to ignore the other girl, the more she noticed her every move as she made her way to the couch across from hers.

"Faye…" Cassie repeated, "You don't have to pretend everything is fine, it's okay to feel sad and upset and angry after everything that happened."

Blue worried eyes were met by cold green ones, but beneath the surface Cassie could see a mix of emotions swirling around inside of her as she tried to push them down.

This is exactly why she had tried to avoid everyone in the circle today, so that she didn't have to deal with all of them feeling sorry for her. She set her face into an unreadable mask and rolled her eyes, "Relax, Cassie! I'm fine."

Cassie gave her an I-don't-believe-you look, and got up to move to the couch Faye was sitting on.

_What is wrong with me? It's just Cassie, the girl you hate for coming here and ruining all your fun. Why do I feel this way when she comes near me? _Faye thought to herself as her heart hammered harder in her chest at every step Cassie took that brought her closer to Faye. She had to use all her strength not to jump off the couch as Cassie sat beside her. She hated this odd feeling of weakness she had started to feel whenever Cassie was around her.

"Just leave me alone, Cassie. It's not like you actually care about how I'm feeling." Faye said, trying hard to hide what she was feeling in her usual mask of bitchiness.

Cassie looked at her seriously, "I do care, Faye. And I know you're not okay. I'm here for you if you need me." She said, placing a comforting hand on Faye's shoulder.

One touch was all it took for the emotions she was trying so hard to push down, to come rushing back up. It hit her hard and her eyes instantly started stinging. The tears soon started spilling out as she buried her face in the other girl's shirt.

**Author's note: **_Thank you for reading this chapter. I was just wondering what you guys would like to see happen in the future for Faye and Cassie. If you have any suggestions for me, please do send them _


	4. Can't you just leave me alone

**Author's note: **_Thank you again to those of you who read my fanfic, it would mean a lot to me if you reviewed and told me what you think and if there's anything you would like me to improve. Anyway, third chapter! Hope you guys like it._

**Chapter 3 – Can't You Just Leave Me Alone**

Cassie arms made Faye feel better, safer, like they had the night before. She didn't understand why, and she didn't really want to, but for now she gladly stayed curled up in her arms as the tears and emotions kept pouring out.

She could feel Cassie's hand making soothing gestures along her back and whispering soft comforting words.

Eventually the tears started to slow, and Faye realized that she had snuggled up beside Cassie as she cried into her shirt. Cassie didn't seem to mind, as she just sat there quietly, waiting for her to calm down again and stop crying, but Faye was too embarrassed to look up at her.

As she wiped away the last of the tears, she heard the voices of the rest of their circle approaching the house. Not wanting anyone else to see her in this state, she composed herself, and bounced off the couch. No way was she getting caught snuggling on the couch with the girl she had clearly made an effort to show that she didn't like.

Cassie looked a little hurt by her jumping off the couch so fast, but she didn't say anything, she just looked at the entrance as the four other members of our circle walked in.

"Great…" I grumbled, but loud enough for them to hear it, "Can't a girl get at least five minutes of peace in this place."

If Diana heard Faye, she just totally ignored what she had just said and looked at Cassie, "Cassie, why didn't you tell us that you found her?"

Cassie moved a little awkwardly on the couch, then her eyes moved from Diana and met Faye's eyes, "I only just got here, and I was about to text you when I heard you outside." They didn't seem quite convinced, but they let it go and their attention went back to Faye.

"Faye, were all worried about you. You seemed kind of out of it at school today, and don't pretend you weren't avoiding us all day." She heard Melissa say, though her eyes were still on Cassie, why would she lie to them, she had probably been here for almost an hour already, and it didn't seem like she was in any kind of hurry to tell them where they were. This thought made her remember what she had just been doing before the rest of them arrived, and she quickly turned her face away from Cassie as she could feel her face growing hot.

"I'm fine, okay. Just leave me alone." Faye said, still feeling embarrassed, all she wanted to do now was go home and curl up in her bed. "I'm going home." She pushed passed them and was out the door before any of them could respond.

"Faye, wait." She heard them call out to her as she was nearing the edge of the clearing. She didn't look back at the abandoned house and stepped into the forest.

She'd been walking for about two minutes, when she heard light footsteps following her, she turned around, expecting to see Melissa or Diana who had come out after her, but her eyes were met by bright blue eyes.

"What do you want?" She snapped at her, a little angrier that she's meant to, but she was still a little flustered by what had happened earlier.

**Author's note:** _This was my longest chapter yet :) I'm really trying to make them as long as I can. Again please leave a review, even if it's not to tell me that you like the story, constructive criticism would also be appreciated. _


	5. The walk home

_**Author's note: **__Sorry for the long wait for this chapter, exam time is starting so I've got a lot of studying to do, so the next couple of chapters might take a little while to be up too. However, I am proud to say that I made this chapter even longer than the last one :) Hopefully you guys like it._

**Chapter 4 – The Walk Home**

_Cassie's point of view_

"I'm going home." Cassie heard Faye say, and then she left before anyone could stop her. The group that was standing by the door had turned around when she left, calling out for Faye to come back, but as always Faye didn't listen to anyone but herself.

When Faye was out of site, all of their eyes turned to Cassie, who was still sitting on the couch, feeling a little awkward to have all of them looking at her for answers.

"Did something happen before we got here?" Diana asked, glancing around the room, and then her eyes fell back onto Cassie, who just sat there quietly for a moment.

"Was Faye being like that before we got here too?" Cassie heard Adam ask, but she wasn't really paying attention to them. Faye had only just stopped crying when the rest of them arrived, and Cassie wanted to make sure that Faye was okay.

"Cassie? Are you listening?" Her head snapped up to them when she realized they were still talking to her.

Cassie looked at them and sighed lightly, "Okay, Faye was pretty upset before you guys got here." She stood up and made her way to the door, "I'll go see if she's okay. I'll see you guys later."

She was barely out the door, when she felt someone grab her arm, "Cassie, wait." Cassie turned to look at Jake, "What?"

He looked out towards the forest that Faye had disappeared into, then looked back at Cassie, "She's not going to want to talk to you when she's angry and upset. It'll just make her angrier, and I don't want her to hurt you." He said, it was sweet that he was worried about her, but right now she needed to find Faye.

"Don't worry, I'll be fine. I can defend myself. And I think she needs a friend right now." She said, pulling her arm lightly, and he let her go, but Cassie could tell that he still didn't want her to go.

"I'll be fine." She repeated, making her way to the edge of the forest where Faye had gone in not too long before. "I'll meet up with you guys later," she called to him before stepping into the line of trees.

She scanned the forest around her as she walked, listening for the sound of Faye's footsteps. She heard them not too long after, it seems like Faye wasn't in as much of a hurry after she was out of sight of the house, Cassie noticed, as Faye's footsteps were trudging slowly through the trees.

When she finally caught sight of her, Faye turned around with what looked like a mix of anger and embarrassment when she saw me, "What do you want?"

"I just-" She started, but then stopped herself, "Nothing." She said, Cassie wanted to make sure that Faye was okay, but she knew that Faye didn't want to be around people who were worrying about her and feeling sorry for her.

_Faye's point of view_

Faye was surprised again, when Cassie answered with "Nothing." She knew that she had a reason for coming after her, but right now she actually respected Cassie for not pushing her and asking her every five minutes if she was alright, but she wasn't going to let Cassie know that.

"Whatever." She said, turning around again and continuing on her way. She heard Cassie's footsteps and then felt her beside her, walking along with her quietly.

She tried to stop the small smile that came across her face, but for some reason, Cassie's presence made her feel a little better, just like it had back at the cabin.

As they kept walking silently along towards Faye's house, she noticed that they were walking closer to one another, their shoulders and hands brushing against each other lightly every few steps. Even though neither one of them was talking, it didn't feel awkward, actually it felt nice. That thought, though, made her move away from Cassie. Why did she keep feeling these things when she was around Cassie? Part of her wished she could just keep on hating her, but the other part…she didn't want to acknowledge what that part wanted.

When they arrived at Faye's front door, Cassie finally broke the silence, "I..um, I'll see you tomorrow." Cassie said a little hesitantly.

"You can stay for a bit if you want." Faye heard herself say, surprised that those words had come out of her mouth, it had not been what she had meant to say, but it had just come out.

Faye could tell that Cassie had been surprised by the offer, but she nodded anyway, "Okay."

Without really realizing it, they both smiled a little at each other before Faye opened the door and led Cassie inside.

_**Author's note: **__Thank you for reading my fanfic, and I really appreciate all the reviews! Also, if any of you are interested in a secret circle rp, I joined secretcirclerpg(.)forumotion(.)com and we need a lot more characters._


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